recently, i reformatted my computer. and i find it lame that. microsoft's firewall in service pack 2 for windows xp blocks activation of windows xp. and it also blocks microsoft's windows update. so i was worried my computer was stupid. until i turned off that stupid firewall. so stupid. i hate microsoft.

and if you really must see my halloween pics.

its funny how starcraft can have such an affect on people. so i go to mlk library for project a. and then the 3 koreans (raphael, jeff, and alex) walk in with a laptop. install starcraft and then start playing. then suddenly, random passerbyers just walk by and stand there and watch the koreans randomly press hotkeys on the keyboard. and move the screen so much. those weirdos. they just sit there and play for 4 hours. nonstop. then they go home. wasted time. those silly people.

so, today i had a great experience with makeup. that eyeshadowing/liner, and lip gloss/lip stick junk. its very interesting. since i wore a dress for this halloween thing, it wouldn't be complete with makeup. so eye shadow and junk was added. and now. i cant get it off. its like waterproof. and my mom doesn't have eye makeup remover. so. my eyes will be lined forever. yes.



i looked like them. somewhat. toshiya and kaoru from dir en grey. toshiya's hair color. and kaoru's lip colors.

"hey, i got my sat scores back." "really? what did you get." "850". "WOW. You did GOOD." "Yea, i know i studied hard. i kind of screwed up on math, but english was easy." life is lovely. i hope you're happy. frappuccino tastes good. apush has midterm. midterms suck. because they sound so scary. and weird people. points. are weird. art is sad.

the crucible. is finally finished in english. it took. 3-4 weeks for this 143 page book. hm. so if we read huck finn. then its going to take like. 15 weeks or something. almost 1 semester. ha. but crucible. is kind of funny. its just about some whore. and some guy having affairs. and then the guy confesses to court. but wife tries to keep his husbands good name. but ends up screwing everyone over. and so everyone gets killed. there must be a really deep meaning to this book like mccarthyism allegory. but its normal english. so we spend most of our time defining words like 'excellency'. (im not lying)

red gel. is bad for hair. today for 'crazy hair day' and for extra credit in chem. i made my hair red. thanks to scott who had this red hair gel. and that stuff is weird. gel is bad. this was like my second time using gel. it doesn't really make hair stand up much. at least that red gel didn't. my hair just fell down again. and its not very crazy. except that red was my hair. and red was on my forehead. and my hand. so it looked like i either slit my wrists and rubbed my head. or i shot someone and blood flew on my face and i just had fun playing in that person's blood. but it was neither. it was red hair gel.

i had this dream once. but i forgot. i remember nothing. nothing at all. i have many personal flashes that people have asked me to make. but i have never made them. some from like may. some from earlier than that. will i ever get to them? maybe. i need a better microphone. or i need to understand my microphone better and be a better voice actor and not screw up flashes with horrible sound and stuff. maybe i should add color. my site is very un-colorful. its black and white. and an occasional red gradient. but color. is so useless. the world is in black and white. its right or wrong! emo pictures seem to be always in black or white and grey. why? dogs must be very emo because they only see in black and white. and bees must be confused and happy because they see more wavelengths of light colors things than humans, but they see a few million more of the same thing. that must be so confusing. having millions of eyes. i have two eyes and they are enough. but i want new eyes. because my current ones are dying. and rotting. and decomposing like 50 years earlier than what its supposed to.

d0Nk3X: like it was all just a video game
d0Nk3X: maybe we're just sims to god
d0Nk3X: and each day is a nanosecond
d0Nk3X: 15 min for ww2
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha
azN xrE taRD BOI: really?
azN xrE taRD BOI: thats how fast the sims is?
d0Nk3X: thats how fast god's would be
d0Nk3X: no
azN xrE taRD BOI: oh
d0Nk3X: he has to have been here since the beginning
d0Nk3X: 30 billin years
d0Nk3X: since its god
d0Nk3X: im betting he doesn't get tired
d0Nk3X: so its probably just been like 30 days straight of playing
d0Nk3X: each billion years is one of his days
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha
d0Nk3X: really
d0Nk3X: its so plausible
d0Nk3X: and who says evolution has to be against religion
azN xrE taRD BOI: but the sims dont question themselves as a computer game.
d0Nk3X: why cant it just be a patch
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha.
d0Nk3X: honestly
d0Nk3X: sims have a free mode
d0Nk3X: where they walk around and do stuff
d0Nk3X: by themselves
azN xrE taRD BOI: so its constantly on free mode?
azN xrE taRD BOI: UNLESS YOU DONT KNOW UR BEING CONTROLLED!?
azN xrE taRD BOI: omG. CALVINISM!
d0Nk3X: we dont know
d0Nk3X: im just proposing
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha
azN xrE taRD BOI: fun
d0Nk3X: calvin was retarded
azN xrE taRD BOI: you should do hw.
d0Nk3X: his religion was stupid
d0Nk3X: no
d0Nk3X: i wonder if we can play sims
d0Nk3X: with the sims in our computers
d0Nk3X: playing sims
d0Nk3X: and those playing sims
d0Nk3X: and continuing for infinity
azN xrE taRD BOI: probably
azN xrE taRD BOI: then ur computer crashes
azN xrE taRD BOI: and dies.
d0Nk3X: god has the best computer
d0Nk3X: how ironic if it was a MAC
azN xrE taRD BOI: lol
azN xrE taRD BOI: u know non sequitur the comic?
d0Nk3X: maybe its like the matrix
d0Nk3X: yeah
azN xrE taRD BOI: whenever God is depicted, he has a mac.
d0Nk3X: hah
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha
d0Nk3X: what does non sequitur the phrase mean?
azN xrE taRD BOI: it does not follow
azN xrE taRD BOI: in latin
d0Nk3X: hrm i had forgotten but heard it someplace
azN xrE taRD BOI: grammar
d0Nk3X: ?
azN xrE taRD BOI: its one of the problems in grammar or something
d0Nk3X: oh
azN xrE taRD BOI: in writing sat class
d0Nk3X: perhaps
azN xrE taRD BOI: i remember hearing non sequitur
d0Nk3X: frankle?
azN xrE taRD BOI: yea
d0Nk3X: see
d0Nk3X: god creats each sim
d0Nk3X: however he wants
d0Nk3X: just like in the game
d0Nk3X: he puts goatees on women
d0Nk3X: makes transvestites
azN xrE taRD BOI: lol
d0Nk3X: he knows programming at its best
d0Nk3X: its probably a lan game
azN xrE taRD BOI: he writes the programming languages that are to be written by others.
d0Nk3X: the holy trinity
d0Nk3X: and the mother of god
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha
d0Nk3X: yes
azN xrE taRD BOI: lan party
d0Nk3X: and they use airport
azN xrE taRD BOI: cuz they use macs.
azN xrE taRD BOI: and they listen to ipods
azN xrE taRD BOI: and itunes
d0Nk3X: yes
azN xrE taRD BOI: whenever theres a massacre
azN xrE taRD BOI: its just a copmuter crashing
d0Nk3X: or jesus alt tabbed out
d0Nk3X: cuz mary IMed him
azN xrE taRD BOI: lol
d0Nk3X: they have to maintain life of the sims
d0Nk3X: like in the game
d0Nk3X: or they die
azN xrE taRD BOI: lol
d0Nk3X: and since the four are superbeings
d0Nk3X: they can work extremely fast
d0Nk3X: like koreans in SC

You are Kawada Shogo! You are a survivor and you
want the government to pay for what it did to
you last game!


What Battle Royale Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

better battle royale quiz.
but i dont like him.
i like being a pathetic loser like hiroki sugimura better.

my name, age, sex, and sexuality tell so much about me.

its weird because. once i turn 17, everything goes down except for cudding. then when im 18, i go up again, but not as much as before except for cudding which is now 100%. then suddenly, im 19 and my cudding goes from 100% down to 3%. and my flirting shoots to 100%. i reach 20 years old and my kissing goes to 100%. i just wonder. how does this work!?

failing takes effort. getting a D is easy in school. just dont do anything. but really failing with like below 10% takes dedication. one homework assignment and you have a high grade again. its hard work. thats why you shouldn't make fun of failures in school. they are dedicating themselves to something. they are putting effort into something. they are working hard. its just that they have different goals.

i find it hard to play piano when im caffeine high and its cold. my fingers hurt moving so fast because it is so caffeinated. and then my feet petals uncontrollably. and the fingers miss the keys and its sad. i hate piano. my fingers hate typing also.

so, the only person i talk to in art class is a weird boy that smokes and talks about weird things. hes funny, because he talks about how he cannot quit smoking and that he needs to satisfy his cravings. its interesting because the usual people that i talk to aren't like him. and he is different, and i like variety. it is interesting because i never hear anyone talk so openly about getting high and smoking and stuff like that. but i guess im glad because then i wont become those people. maybe im going to go crazy and be influenced by him just because i was put in art class.

so i bought my dr pepper today. and the lunch lady who knows me by now asked if that was it. then i said yes and she said 'you cant live on dr pepper alone'. i feel so sad. maybe she cares about my health. or she just wants to rip me off some more with all that expensive food. bah.

there is a smoke detector in my house. it is losing batteries. so it is beeping loudly. i am angry. i hate loud beeping things. its very distracting. i think i am just going to die. then it will never beep again.


Boys #11 Sugimura Hiroki

You are Sugimura Hiroki. You are one cool
dude. Tall, handsome, all the girls seem to
love you, but you only have feelings for that
one special girl that... 'stole' your heart.


Which Battle Royale boy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

thats interesting. too bad the girl of his dreams emptied a whole magazine on him.

i went on my computer to write a new post. but i forgot and started doing my test rewrite. but now i am reminded so i must post. i watched about 5 minutes of that baseball game between that yankees and red sox. i think. and baseball is so boring. in that 5 minutes all it showed was 2 pitches. one missed. second hit but guy got out. then after that. all it did was talk about all the players. and showed pictures of them spitting weird things out. they all have skills of spitting little drops of saliva out. its lovely. so thats baseball apparently. my only impression of baseball is guys that spit and guys that take steroids but really dont need it because they run about 100 feet each 20 minutes. i hate sports.

opposite of everything is nothing.
but opposite of nothing can be something.
something is not everything.
no nothing is not everything.
not everything is not nothing.
something is something.
opposite of something is something else.
opposite of something else is something else.
nothing leads back to its opposite.
opposites dont make sense.
the united states constitution is long
my writing like this takes up a lot of vertical space.
i used to write horizontally.
and it would take up less space.
but before that i wrote like this.
each idea got its own line.
but i changed.
and i changed again.
but did i have to change back to this way?
or could there have been another opposite change from writing sideways.
oh no.

the mah intramural i wrote was too easy apparently. too many 4,5,6's.

homecoming was lovely. dinner is lovely. drawing with crayons is lovely. watching battle royale is lovely. pictures are here. theres not much because everything else was blurry pictures.

I DONT KNOW HOW TO USE GEL! i cleaned my house. and its clean.

art class makes me so depressed because the kids always want to hear their favorite band called three days grace. and they just hate everyone. and want to be just like 'you'. and that stuff is so sad. and their annoying guitar. it makes me want to commit suicide.

x shunpoko x: we should have a soph/junior chicken party
azN xrE taRD BOI: buy millions of chickens and just rip them apart?
x shunpoko x: depends on who we invite
x shunpoko x: it could like be in front of your house to avoid getting run over by cars
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha
x shunpoko x: or my backyard since its pretty big
azN xrE taRD BOI: just take up the whole court
azN xrE taRD BOI: and just fill it up with chicken
x shunpoko x: YEAH O-O
x shunpoko x: and have about 200 kids eat it
azN xrE taRD BOI: lol
x shunpoko x: yeah. but dont invite the weird kids
x shunpoko x: cause theyd like analyze the chicken

we live on the same street if you dont get the court thing.

'i know its homecoming week, so if you drink, dont drive, if you drive dont drink. and if you have sex, use a condom' - my english teacher.

does pathetic have anything to do with apathetic. because i am playing beethoven's pathetique for piano and i played the first two movements already. and now im on the 3rd and in the notes, it says 'this movement is less pathetic than the preceding'. so how can music be pathetic? so i thought maybe its more apathetic. but the 3rd movement sounds so much more sad than the others. so does pathetic have anything to do with apathetic? or can music just sound pathetic.

now that psats are over. it seems like everything is nice and lovely again. but its not. because theres still school. but it doesn't feel like theres school tomorrow. but this week is 1 day shorter. yay. 1 day less. i am so happy. but theres still school tomorrow.

16 years ago. i was born. its interesting because being 16 feels the same as 15. and yesterday i didn't even remember today was my birthday. things that are forgotten. thanks to sarah for that lovely balloon i had to carry around the whole day, the ghost thing and the card. thanks to judy for card. thanks to danny,albert for 2 liter dr pepper. and everyone else. even the weird gangsters in my art class.

i like being 15 more than 16 because yesterday, i was 15 and today i am 16 and closer to psats.

whatever. my eyes are like rotting out of my head. they are very tired and dont want to look at anything. they especially hate this computer screen. im going to fall down and fall asleep and then they will leak out of my eye sockets. then i will be blind and there will be juice on my table. maybe i should put eyedrops in my eyes. that could help my eyes. or it couldn't. but whats the lost? eyedrops. yes. what if the pH for the eyedrops are too high!? then my eyes will like melt and explode even more. and my eyes hurt.

haha lim: go get them tiger
haha lim: i think i'm gonna shoot miself

i love tables. i love tables that you can write on. and tables that you can put data in. i love this world. i love everyone. i love my computer. i love my life. i love MLK library. i love project a. i love weird dreams. i love being unable to sleep before an sat. i love being so afraid that its distracting. i love chinese school. i love psats. i love confusing funny things. i want to make a movie. but school is in the way. but i could just drop out of school and hopefully get into a lovely career in movie making. but i doubt it because im lazy and stupid. but how do all those lucky retarded bands just become so lucky. and drop out of school and become super famous. must be their dedication. im not very dedicated either. oh no. oh no.

i had this very weird dream about koi fish and a retarded mute boy. it was something like a retarded mute boy was kidnapped and 5 koi fish went off to rescue him. it was kind of a depressing dream with a bunch of weird confusing things. the retarded mute boy was very young. and all i remember were koi swimming in an ocean or the fish tank or something. and talking to my grandfather in japanese. I AM SO CONFUSED.

in art, the teacher decided to play music. so first he played john mayer. he isn't that bad, but a female voice would be much better. so then some guy requested the beatles and his cd was played. beatles are weird. i dont like them. thankfully the cd was all scratched up so the songs got all messed up. then the punks in the class were like "OMGOMG. lets play the MISFITS!" and misfits were played. first track was instrumental and it sounded interesting. very distorted guitar. bass. stuff. slipknot stuff. sounded so satanic. but once track 2 began. it suddenly became the happiest ska band in the world with distortion. its like rancid. make themselves seem all scary and deathly and crazy, but in reality, they are the happiest people. i guess teacher didn't like it, so the other rebellious punks put in three days grace. and all i have to say is emo doesn't deliver what it promises. i am unsatisfied.

i saw this thing that said "this year, more than 40000 women will die from breast cancer." so i wondered if this is true. how can they be so sure that that many people will die. since this is a donation thing, what if they discover the cure for breast cancer this year? then there will be less than 40000. then that ad will be wrong. and i wonder if people will sue. because people sue for stupid things now. such as warning labels on mcdonalds stuff. and things like people cant make coffee in RVs. because some guy left his RV on cruise and went in the back to make coffee and the RV crashed. so he sued the RV company. so stupid. whatever. i digress. also. that 40000 makes it seem so negative. why scare people? why not say "money is good for breast cancer research" instead of DEATH!. i wonder if then people's brain will go crazy and say that the 40000 must be fulfilled and a bunch of people's brains just make cancer and die. its also sexism. because men can die from breast cancer also. but they segregate the women breast cancer.

such a pretty pink. oh, that pink is so pretty. colors are so pretty. why are there colors? black and white is so lovely. all the colors are horrible. black and white are horrible. stop it. math is a formula. art is pencil. english is words. us history is dead people. chemistry is reactions. webdesign is code. and that is all school really is. its the same thing over and over again. daily things are boring. school is a daily thing.

haha lim: ok so here's the plan
haha lim: whoever has poison puts it the food
haha lim: and then that person eats it
haha lim: then ppl w/ guns shoot everything
haha lim: and then me w/ mi fan start going hxc gackt and do matrix
azN xrE taRD BOI: you can beat me with the fan
azN xrE taRD BOI: ha
haha lim: and then u can hav ur pot lid dodgin everything
haha lim: and then max has his samurai sword killing everything
haha lim: so at the end
haha lim: all that will be left will be u and me
azN xrE taRD BOI: we all die.
haha lim: and then i'll shoot u
haha lim: and then i'll smile when i'm dead
azN xrE taRD BOI: and ull run off the roof
azN xrE taRD BOI: and say 'its not my fault'
haha lim: and then u can be in battle royale ii w/ max
haha lim: haha
haha lim: and then in homecoming royale II, u try to figure out why i smiled!

cya later. is like cyanide. except only with 3 letters in common. yea. something like that. but if a person eats cyanide, he cant really say cya later. because he will never see that person again. unless that person believes in religion. and believes that they will go to heaven or some afterlife place. then that person can say cya later. but if the person he says it to must understand religion to understand why he is saying 'cya later' when he is eating cyanide. or he will think person eating cyanide is a maniac. but then person eating cyanide will think he is the normal person and consider the other a maniac. so everyone is weird. its all based on point of view.

today my grandfather's old japanese friend came to visit so we went to go eat. so that japanese guy spoke a lot of japanese and i just smiled and sat there and thought about how i should have maybe understood some stuff he said, but i didn't. and how sad i was. it was interesting. my fortune cookie said "simplicity of character is the natural result of profound thought." but if you think of that too deeply, it makes you very un-simple. oh my. what a crazy fortune.

d0Nk3X: my tea's gone cold and im wondering why
azN xrE taRD BOI: lol
azN xrE taRD BOI: dido
azN xrE taRD BOI: i know that song
d0Nk3X: such funny lyrics
azN xrE taRD BOI: i liked that song
d0Nk3X: heat dissapation and time
d0Nk3X: i would yell out at her concert
azN xrE taRD BOI: lol
d0Nk3X: then she would have me killed

last night. i watched tv. it is very rare that i do. and so i watched this lame show called 'wife swap'. its pretty weird because they switch very different wives and then watch the results. and as expected. there are arguments and blah blah. so they hate each other. it just causes more people to hate each other. rich wife in poor family now. and poor wife in rich family now. silly people. i wonder where they get these ideas.

BeatingIt2Hard: I have a xanga now =(
BeatingIt2Hard: But.
BeatingIt2Hard: I don't use itmuch.
BeatingIt2Hard: It's bad for me.
BeatingIt2Hard: WheneverI look at it.
BeatingIt2Hard: Suicidal thoughts pour into my mind.